Most girls start to experiment with makeup in their preteens. They learn from their mothers, sisters, friends, and YouTube. That was not the case for me. I don’t think my mother wore much makeup, my older sister didn’t either, and YouTube wasn’t a thing when I was 12.
That left me with friends. Unluckily, most of my female friends didn’t care much about makeup and the other girls I knew who liked it were mean to me. Combine this lack of help with my limited eyesight and you have a recipe for poorly applied makeup. I recognized this pretty early on and by the time I was in the eight grade I’d mostly given up on it.
Feeling left out
The thing is, I’ve always wanted to have the option to glam it up. I’m not trying to do red carpet looks, but being able to apply sparkly eyeshadow and a bronzer with some level of confidence would be nice. There are lots of little things that I don’t get to enjoy because of my eyesight and this one made me feel a little left out, especially later in high school and college when more of my friends were into it.
I’ve tried a few times to figure out foundation. I had some hormonal acne that I would have liked to cover up, but matching my skin tone is something I can’t do alone. Even If I could. I was so insecure about being able to blend well enough that having a few pimples was better than worrying about my makeup all day.
By college the only things I felt comfortable were mascara, a little eyeliner, and maybe a lipstick.
Finding what works for me
At some point in my mid-twenties someone introduced me to Sephora. Up till then I usually washed my face with water or some neutrogena cleanser and that was it. When I started birth control my hormonal acne mostly disappeared, and I’d never really thought about moisturizing, exfoliating, serums, masks, and I totally sucked at using SPF. Around 24 I got my first “fancy” skincare product; an oil free moisturizer from Bosca. I loved it!
A few years later I learned about a tinted moisturizer. My mind was blown. It offered just enough coverage to smooth out my skin tone without causing me anxiety about blending and makeup lines. I mostly wore it on dates.
About three years ago I discovered Anastasia Beverly Hills tinted brow gel. I am not the neatest applier of brow gel and there has been one or two occasions when I’ve had a smudged forehead, but it’s ok, I’m finding ways to make it work and I really like what it does for my face
Now I’m in my 30’s and my lack of concern for my skin has caught up with me. One day I looked in the mirror and was like “HOLY SHIT! If I can see those lines they must be real!” And so I embarked on a quest to learn about skincare.
I went to the mecca that is Sephora and started talking to the sales associates about my concerns, I tried samples, I started googling about different issues and products. Now I use retinol, charcoal and aloe masks, AHA and BHA exfoliants, I’m experimenting with different serums, and I even wear sunscreen…most days. I also wear makeup more often, not because I’m trying to hide my skin or participate in the stereotypes, but because I enjoy it. I’m using quarantine to play around and get comfortable with products that have intimidated me to the point of tears in the past.
Makeup is a fun tool we use to enhance and play with our look, but the best thing you can do to feel good about your appearance is to take care of your body and skin.
Rainy Day Rags 